Biggest Loser Revealed

And it isn't me. Today was weigh-in day. Gained another half pound. I did eat out twice but I was not too much over my calories. I also worked out alot. It sucks when there is a simple mathematical formula for weight loss (calories in - calories out = hopefully a calorie deficit of at least 3500) which should yield a loss of at least one pound per week and it is not working for me. Would someone please explain that to my body?

So yesterday was really a Charlie Brown day for me. You know what I mean? Nothing goes right and was totally like a Debbie Downer. I even depressed my trainer. He was not prepared for it. Here were the thoughts in my head:

1. The kids took a writing test and did sucky on the composition but in reality they are pretty decent writers
2. I am trying to finish all assessments for the year but they are never ending (really I have tested and taught them how to take tests for the past 30 days and it super sucks for all of us)
3. I have 13 days of school left to pack up all my crap and I am trying to be organized about it
4. I started to see a dermatologist for my acne and it is not getting any better yet so I have to keep trying this stuff for another 6 weeks and if it doesn't improve I have to start all over from scratch
5. I have weighed in the 220s for a LONG time now. I want to have a decent drop soon
6. My knees started hurting again (I had this problem when I first started working out a lot)
7. My hamstrings are always tight which makes me even less flexible when I stretch (and hurts a bit)
8. I ran for a mile at a 6.7 on the treadmill and was sucking wind pretty bad

All of this made me feel like I was making negative progress. Now I still get comments daily but since my weight has not moved in the last month I feel like a fraud accepting the complements.

I do realize every one's journey is different. Evidently mine is long, slow and bloated (I really feel like my stomach is bloated all the time even though it is way smaller than before and i cut back on diet cokes and sodium).

As for biggest loser (which I will be sad not to see again until the fall), I am surprised. Helen is the LAST contestant I ever expected to win. I am sad she won. That should have been her daughter, she seems pretty selfish to me. And what is with that hair? Good lord, fix it already. That saggy skin really made her look old. But did you see Jerry? Way to go old man!! He is a true inspiration. He was only on the ranch for two weeks and lost 177 pounds? He is totally rockin' it. I'd say everyone else looked pretty good. Tara and Laura look like completely different people. So did Sione, Filipe and Kristin. I "heart" them all. Let's hope they all keep it off.

Today is my anniversary. I way 20 pounds less than the day I got married so I am happy about that. My husband cooked my favorite thing he makes - teryaki chicken wings (grilled, I am not a fan of fried food). Then we went for a jeep ride to get the best ice cream ever. So obviously I did not count calories tonight. I think I will put the scale away for a while. Especially if I keep screwing up the calorie calculations with too many calories in.

Hope you all had a good week. May we all be a big bunch of losers!

It's Been a Year....(with pics)

May 2008 is the first photo (I am in a black jacket), May 2009 is the second photo (I am in brown with swirly dots).

It's been a year....since I went to the last book signing of a great author's book tour. Her name is Jen Lancaster and she is the author of four hilarious memoirs, including Such a Pretty Fat. She is contracted to write two more books in the next two years. I read Such a Pretty Fat about three times before I decided that maybe I should try and get a personal trainer as she did in the book (she also examines different types of diets and tries a few in an attempt to lose about 50 pounds).

This year, she is far more poplar and I had to wait a long time to get my book signed and get my photo with her. I really wanted that photo so I could see the difference since last year. The photos don't show much because of the way I am standing (or squatting) in the second picture. But I am including them for you because I do not post pics that often and I love when you all post pics.

Sorry I am so bad at how I post pics. Maybe someday I will learn a better way. Anywho, I am tired and bloated but must drag my arse out to run with the dogs. Enjoy your day!

Awww.....she's so sweet!

Well thanks so much to Aimee over at Best of What's Around. She is so sweet and gave me an award. I do enjoy her blog so.

I guess here is where I pass it on. The rules? Pass it along to 5 fellow super bloggers, and comment on their blog to let them know how lucky they are today! When you present your Super Blogger awards, link back to the super blogger who gave it to you. So here are some good ones.

1. Tisha over at A Blob Blog has a very interesting journey going on that I am fascinated with. I am so glad she is sharing her story, I am learning a lot from her.
2. Acting Skinny is young, fresh and honest. I enjoy reading her true to heart yet slightly sarcastic entries. You never know what she will post.
3. Stages of Change is a very introspective blogger. He analyzes his journey and shares with all. I wish he would post even more.
4. Deb over at Shedding My FatSuit is brutally honest, which is difficult to do. Yet, she keeps on. Her strength is so admirable. I enjoy all the posts - no matter what the topic.
5. WildFluffySheep over at Infatuation:it will eat you is a great writer and she lives in England which makes her blog even more fun to read. It is heart-felt, honest and entertaining.

There are so many others. I just hope everyone knows that when you share your stories, they are appreciated.

In other news......those damn lady troubles are back and helped me acquire half a pound. Thanks uterus-toting body of mine. I am bloated and in pain which made my trainer pity me (for like the 2nd time ever), he said I look like shit and cut my workout way short today. Man, he really knows how to sweet talk the ladies.

I also went on a job interview Friday. I am a 1st grade teacher and am currently working in an unstable environment administration-wise. So I put in for a transfer in case I wanted out. I was not going to pursue it. But, surprise! It pursued me. I got a call on Wednesday, set up the interview for Friday (what could it hurt?), interviewed for like an hour and a half, was offered the job before I left, decided to take it this morning. What, a whirlwind! I was going to have to move classrooms anyway so if I am packing up my crap, I might as well really move it. Also, I have shrunk out of my school shirts (I do not think that is the technical term, but all my shirts are too big now) and need to buy new ones. So that will be a huge pain in my ass as the school year draws to a close but I think it was meant to be. Another workout of lugging boxes of teacher crap in the muggy Texas weather.

So now I need to catch up on everyone else's adventures. Hopefully you all lost more weight than I did this week. I am just going to use my stick-to-it-ness (another of my technical terms) to keep working at it and hope it will even out later on down the road (like tomorrow - I am so impatient).

Best Girl's Day Ever!!

Saturday was sooooo much fun. It involved a lot of shopping. We spent hours inside of JCPenny (we had coupons - which is so not us to use them that is why we are so proud). Let me preface this post by saying my best bud is 5'8 and a size 10 (with a flat tummy). This after having twins a year ago. She has her body issues too, but not like the rest of us.

I am 5'10 and currently a size 16 (bordering on a 14 - that is to say on Saturday I tried a size 14 shorts that had about 8 inches of muffin top, however I did get them zipped and buttoned - that poor button). At Avenue I can easily wear a 14 but in other stores, not so much.

So this is the first time that my BB and I could shop in the same store. In the dressing room I was in, I found some interesting outfits that someone left behind. I decided that if it fit I would try it on and then go to her dressing room. Oh yes, it fit. It was an awesome outfit that I think was left over from 1989, including the shoulder pads. We delighted in it so much we had to take a picture. Here is where I would share the pic but it is on my BB's phone. That turned into me picking out some fabulous outfits for my BB to try on. We laughed so hard, it hurt. We were so annoying that a salesperson came in and asked that we get our clothes and leave because customers were waiting. Oh yeah? Well so was I. I waited a long time to be able to enjoy time shopping. Usually it is a lonely and not fun experience. I did not leave. I moved into BB dressing room and started trying on people's left overs in there. God I love JCPenny (best workout yoga pants, by the way).

We also got pedicures, which is when I was told I had an ingrown toe nail (no wonder it hurt). I had never had one before. And we went out to dinner at a fabulous restaurant and had a cocktail and everything. I did not even gain any weight (and I ate a lot - yeah cheat meal!)

However, Sunday I made all my fabulous Cinco de Mayo foods (early I know), but it sure was heavenly. My weight went up half a pound. I paid for all that eating today at the gym. My trainer is really burning up my muscles - jerk.

Today we were off school (scheduled holiday, not swine flu). I went to see my doc because I have had some bad dizzy spells the last few weeks. I suspected my blood pressure medicine so I tracked my blood pressure for a week. A few things happened at the doc's office.

1. My doc did not recognize me because of the weight loss and I was just there in January
2. She took me off all my blood pressure medicine - yeah!! I have been on it for at least 7 years.
3. I had to come back later in the day and have the ingrown toe nail removed. Yuck!

So that was my fabulous day off: workout, doc, nap, laundry, blog reading (my fav), and now procrastinating school work for the kiddos. We are making the cutest Mother's Day cookbook. Writing with kids is so entertaining. I highly recommend it.

On a random side note - my mother pointed out to me that I was a size 16 when I moved to Texas 9 years ago. The funny thing is, I currently weigh 30 pounds more than I did when I moved here. That is how much of a difference exercise can make in your body. It just proves to me what I have been thinking this whole journey. I do not want to get back to something that I once was, I want to create something that never has been. I am not quite sure what all that entails yet but I am enjoying the journey of discovery along the way. Enjoying that day of shopping in the same fitting room with some of the same clothes with my BB was worth every calorie counted and every challenging workout. I look forward to much, much more.

An Exciting Day!

At least that is what I am hoping for.

Not too exciting weight loss wise except that I did have a loss. Same amount of hard work and sticking to the diet as last week and I lost 2.5 pounds. I am closing in on the 65 pound mark. Slowly but surely.

Today will be different, well after my workout anyway. My best bud and I get to spend the whole day together. No babies. As much as I love the girls we have not had a day where we could go anywhere we wanted in over a year. We are going shopping, getting pedicures and going to a real restaurant (with some cocktails). My cheat meal for the week will be a big one I am sure.

I will be happy if I do not gain this week because it is also my favorite holiday - Cinco de Mayo!! I must make pico de gallo (my favorite food on Earth) and some guacamole (I am picky and love to make it myself - at least it is filled with good fat). I know that it will not kill me but all the chips I eat with it might. In order to eat more, I am willing to forgo my margaritas (which I love!!). Sacrifices.

Something funny happened yesterday after school (I teach first grade). I saw one of my dad's from last year. As you know teacher's do not have favorites, however his daughter is my favorite kid of all time. They are Hispanic (not the best English) and he and his wife went through an ugly divorce. Daughter was distraught and angry at everyone (including me). I was her teacher for 2 years (kinder and 1st). He and I had many conversations. I love him, he is a great dad. Yesterday I saw him for the first time in a long time. When I started to talk to him in the hallway, he had no idea who I was. When he figured it out, his mouth drooped open and he tried to find the words. He had to use some hand gestures to show me that I had lost weight. It was so cute! Then other parents in the hall made comments (all positive, I like our families). This was all done in front of a lot of teachers. I think the hating of me has begun.

Has anyone else experienced a little hating at the work place since embarking on their weight loss journey? How do you handle it? I am careful not to speak of diet or exercise or needing new clothes in front of everyone but it is noticed and brought up by others. I am just not sure what to do. I would love some advice.

Hope you have a super week!!

Another Week, Another Weigh-In

Hello friends!

Well, this week was okay I suppose. Just a little blah. This week I lost 1.5 pounds bringing the total to 62. I am not complaining but I must say I worked really hard for that. Here is what this week held for me:

1. A week of sticking to my 1600 calories/day diet and I used the calories wisely
2. 5 personal training sessions with my "we're gonna really change it up this week" trainer
3. 1 Zumba class - so fun and really worked my abs
4. Running/walking with the dogs 1.2 miles every morning

Now I ask......is 1.5 pounds really a fair trade off? I am going to shut my pie hole now and just appreciate the loss and hope next week's number will reflect more.

My training sessions this week were hard. My trainer was explaining how he was really gonna pump up the cardio in it and we would do blah, blah, blah (in my head I hear the teacher on Charlie Brown sometimes "whah, whah, whah, whah...whah"). I always try to interpret and then ask for clarification. Here is how the conversation went:

Trainer: Blah, blah, blah, cardio, harder, blah, blah, blah.
Me: So you are going to induce a heart attack?
Trainer: No, just short of a heart attack.
Me: Super.

And that is what we did. Today I pushed myself running on the treadmill before we started. But of course that was not near enough. By the time we were finished I had completely soaked two sports bras and my t-shirt with hard work (otherwise known as yucky sweat).

And yes I wear two sports bras. Not because I have a big chest, quite the opposite. However, one sports bra is super duper strong so I do not move when I run (imagine using duct tape to hold you in place only far more pleasant) and the other is a full body tank thing I wear over the super duper bra. I love these, especially if my shirt goes up (which it has on occasion) no one needs to see my big, pale belly. I have yet to find a combo bra I like so I just double up.

Now you know far more about me than you ever wanted to.

So my trainer wants me to use some of my precious 1600 calories each day to eat a protein bar. I am not a fan. If I only get 1600 calories, I want to use them on real food that I enjoy. He does insist that it will trick my body and speed up my metabolism. I guess I should try it. Afterall, look at all the work I did this week and my body wasn't buying it.

Hope you all had great losses this week!

Do You Watch Hell's Kitchen?

As every weekend, I spent some time cleaning out my Tivo/DVR. So now I am caught up on my shows. One of my favorites is Hell's Kitchen. Do you watch? It is very fun to watch as far as reality TV goes. There is a contestant on there this year named Robert. He is in his late 20's. He is very cute and his personality is rockin. He could have his own show in my opinion. He is a very hard worker and seems to be a talented chef. He also weighs 400 pounds.

Now anyone who watches the show knows that Chef Ramsey is not the nicest guy when he is in the heat of a moment. He never really belittled him for his weight other that calling him 'big boy.' There were rewards from challenges that Robert could not enjoy. For example, the boys were supposed to take a helicopter to Catalina Island and stay a few hours. Robert however exceeded the weight limit for the helicopter and he had to take a ferry and meet the boys there. By the time he made it, it was time to come back. So no reward for him (at least the boys rode back with him). Another reward was for the boys to ride Segways at the park but he was too large so he had to ride a bike and could not keep up with the group.

This week the remaining contestants went to Atlantic city to see the resort in which the winner's restaurant will be. They had just sat down to a dinner with an executive chef - the most important dinner of their careers - when Robert excused himself from the table, never to return. He was having chest pains. His blood pressure was 160/100. He was rushed to the hospital. He had to stay all night. He missed the dinner, the rubbing elbows, the spa treatments. Basically he has missed out on all the rewards for his hard work.

He returned to Hell's Kitchen to tell everyone that he has some fluid sack around his heart which is part of heart disease and he would be leaving the competition. Which his health is important, I understand. But his dream ended just like that. Not because he was lazy. Not because he didn't care. Ultimately because he was obese.

I do not want that to be me. I cannot think of anything that I have not been able to do because of my weight but I know some things were not as enjoyable because of it. I also have high blood pressure and am scared of having a stroke. I am now about the weight I was when they put me on the blood pressure medicine so I am hoping that maybe I am close to coming off.

I guess my point is, that if you have a dream that you have worked so hard for, it would be devastating for it never to come to fruition strictly because you are over-weight. I plan on taking this problem down (hopefully down under two hundred pounds someday) and managing it from there.

I hope everyone's dreams get to come true - we all deserve it.

Oh yeah - I also Tivoed the movie Grey Gardens on HBO. Watched it this morning and it is excellent! So you may want to see that one if you can.

Have a great week!